Meet Little Penis, the cute dinky winky you bring to life when you put your finger in the puppet in this delightfully crass and hilarious parody board book for adults.
This board book parodies childrenÃ¢ÂÂs finger puppet books with its bold colors and simple illustrations, but this book is not for children! Instead, put your finger in the hole in the back of the book, and follow the adventures of Little Penis as he goes swimming (poor shrinking Penis!); gets out of bed early, so big and tall; gets a gentle kiss and hug (along with a good hard tug); head to a bar, gets drunk, and hooks up; and moreÃ¢ÂÂgetting bigger and bigger with the turn of each page. Sometimes heÃ¢ÂÂs up and sometimes heÃ¢ÂÂs down, but thereÃ¢ÂÂs a happy ending as he finds his snug, warm place called home!
Orders are processed and prepared for shipment within 2-3 business days. Business days exclude weekends and national holidays. Orders are shipped via USPS first class or ground or UPS ground depending on weight and location. Signatures are required for orders over $200 and tracking is provided. We recommend that you provide a shipping address that has a secure delivery space. Pacifier cannot be responsible for theft or damage of packages that have been confirmed as delivered via provided tracking services.
Items that are noted as pre-order will ship during the timeframe specified. If the vendor updates the back-order timeframe, we will provide updates and you are welcome to cancel the order anytime prior to shipment.
Rush shipping is available at an additional price - please call us at 612.767.8501 to inquire about expedited shipping options. We currently ship standard within the continental United States, but please call us at 612.767.8501 if you wish to ship to Alaska, Hawaii, or an APO base to calculate shipping cost.
Please note our team is available to help during our hours. We can be reached at 612.767.8501 between 8AM-5PM CST Monday through Friday. We are closed on New Years Day, Easter Sunday, Memorial Day, July 4th, Labor Day, Thanksgiving day, and Christmas Day.
To make a return, please email firstname.lastname@example.org to request return authorization. In your message, please include your name, order number and the item(s) you wish to return. We will get back to you within 2 business days to provide return authorization on applicable orders and shipping instructions.
Returns made within 14 days of order delivery receive a full refund to the original form of payment or exchange. Returns made within 15-60 days of order delivery receive store credit which never expires.
We do not cover the shipping cost of returns, any shipping fees will be deducted from your refund.The shipping fee depends on the size and weight of your return order. Please call us at 612.767.8501 if you have any questions.Merchandise must be in new, unused condition and packaging intact and with original seals.Strollers, carseats and furniture may only be exchanged/returned if packaging remains sealed.
Return and exchange timeframe restrictions apply to strollers, carseats, and furniture.
Clearance, special order items, and opened gear/furniture items are final sale and not returnable or exchangeable.
We ship USPS First Class or Ground or UPS Ground, depending on weight. Signatures are required for orders over $200 and tracking is provided. We recommend that you provide a shipping address that has a secure delivery space. Pacifier cannot be responsible for theft of packages that have been confirmed as delivered via provided tracking services.